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Losing My Light

by Jheralynne Faith

I still remember the moment my dad told me that one of my older cousins had drowned. I sat across from my dad on my grandmother’s couch. It was a hot evening in July and my day had been perfect, until that moment. I stared through the glass door, watching as cars drove by. Someone that I loved, someone that I looked up to, someone that knew how to swim, had just drowned.

Recently, I found myself in a place where my time spent with God wasn’t as long, my perspective wasn’t as clear, and my smile didn’t shine nearly as bright. I had lost my light, and I was spiritually drowning.

“Be pleased, O LORD, to deliver me! O LORD, make haste to help me!”

Psalm 40:13 (ESV)

My cousin’s lungs were filled with more water, and less air, which made it harder and harder for him to breathe. Similarly, I saw less of God in my life, which weakened my spiritual connection. My faith was not strong, I didn’t have much joy, and my passion had almost completely dissolved. I was quickly drifting away and struggling to get back to my Creator, my Source, my Light.

If you’re like me and you’ve ever felt as though you weren’t thriving spiritually, you know that such a place can be discouraging. Whether a non-believer, a new Christian, or walking with God for many years, we all have a God-sized void that only our Savior can fill. Just as our physical bodies cannot thrive when disconnected from our source of life, we cannot thrive spiritually without the breath of God in our lives.

“And I, if I be lifted up from the earth, will draw all men unto me.”

John 12:32 (KJV)

In an attempt to retrieve a football at the beach, my older cousin went past a sudden drop-off. He knew how to swim, but the sudden change beneath his feet caused him to panic. Strangers tried to help him. One man even dove into the water fully clothed, doing all that he could. But because my cousin was so frantic, no one was able to help him. He began pulling his rescuers down, further into the water.

“Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me.”

John 15:4 (NLT)

What do you do when spiritually, you feel lifeless? Maybe you don’t desire God like you used to, or perhaps you’re desperate for that relationship to be refreshed and renewed. My prayer is that you will reconnect to your Source of joy, peace, and guidance. Without Him, we will never experience the fullness of the abundant life He desires for us to have. No matter how far you’ve gone, God is waiting with open arms, ready to welcome you back with a new beginning. However, the choice is always yours. Will you take His hand, or will you continue to sink?

“The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.”

John 10:10 (KJV)


If this message resonates with you, follow up by taking another step toward God. Watch this sermon from Pastor Chris Hodges at Church of the Highlands.

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6 thoughts on “Losing My Light

  1. Great writing. Sorry for the loss of your cousin. Thank you for sharing a piece of your heart.

  2. God has spoken to me through you.This is the message I needed to hear. Thank you for sharing your heart.

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